birds fly and dogs die

2007-07-16T03:23:00.000-07:00

both an irritating and amazing day all-in-one...

morning wad an amazing experience! =)

when i reached the traffic light near RP...

i was listening to the song by the used "yesterday feelings"

then i heard some people laughing so i turned around~

then i saw her! the ONE!

then the lyrics went... "but today i wasted away, for today was on my mind"

then the both of us looked at each other for like... around 30 secs...

then i turned away thinking.. "wtf?! omg... got so zun or not?! wtf man!?"

that was like one of the best days of my RP life~

then... later in class was super boring...

jerome and iskandah pissed me off in class even though i dun seem so...

pure irritants...

but no matter... what happened in the morning...

i hope i can turn back time and feel it all over again... LOL~

i hope tml can re-visit the scene again! =x

2007-07-12T07:16:00.000-07:00

quite sometime nv blog already huh? xP

today's quite an interesting day...

survived on a bottle of milktea in the morning till after training... =.=

the suffering is in-describable... my back-ached like no tml when running...

head felt heavy like some 15 kg crap was on my head...

then later legs wobbly like jelly...

after the last 50 push-ups the feeling of puking is super horrible...

but quite a surprise LOL~

A for enterprise UT2 =DDD

finally got back what i had last week~

missed by 0.5 last UT got it back this time! =DDDDDDDD

2007-07-07T05:54:00.001-07:00

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
feeling so faithless
lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
put under the pressure
of walking in your shoes
[caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow]
every step that I take is another mistake to you
[caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow]

I've
become so numb
I can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
is be more like me
and be less like you.

can't you see that your smothering me
holding too tightly
afraid to lose control
cause everything that you thought I would be
has fallen apart right in front of you.

[caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow]
every step that I take is another mistake to you
[caught in the undertow,just caught in the undertow]
and every second I waste is more than I can take.

I've
become so numb

I can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
is be more like me
and be less like you.

And I know
I may end up failing too

But I know
you were just like me
with someone disappointed in you.

I've
become so numb
I can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
is be more like me
and be less like you.

I've
become so numb
I can't feel you there
[tired of being what you want me to be]
I've
become so numb
I can't feel you there
[tired of being what you want me to be]

http://www.metrolyrics.com/lyrics/206525/Linkin_Park/Numb

2007-07-07T01:24:00.000-07:00

got back from land training on thursday... left at 6.45 never finish training...

was told that i need to pay $45 for 1-star kayak cert...

rejected... i dun want to pay for it and i dun want to ask my mum to pay for it... not worth to me...

when i got home thought about some stuff... then i noticed how much th world is plastic...

the way people treat one another... it usually is fake? i think anyone should be able to see it...

sooo missed the old secondary days... not so plastic... even though there would be...

anyway... she said she sees me as acting as someone i am not...

who is she to judge me for who i am? i was nice at first cause i am still not used to the school

and the way things work in poly i am feeling much better now so i just let loosed the me

that was in secondary school believe it if you want i am not as nice as you thought...

after all the heartbreaks and torture there is nothing less i wanna be except being more myself...

i hate being plastic myself already la... spent 6 month being plastic in school and became a

push-over i dun like it so i won't let it...

2007-07-04T09:51:00.000-07:00

water training... =)

same stuff... 8km... but ended 7 as usual...

but 1 cap today only... i think i am just pure suay...

a Hjc(if i am not wrong) K1 just came in behind me in racing lane...

then i heard their coach on loudhailer "watch out for that T1!"

so i was like woops~ paddled double fast~

then made a turn, rudder left... then when i try to paddle right... *splash~*

the paddle hit me knee then capped~ crapness...

then later when going on the 4th lap... bob made me and choon meng turn in at 500m mark...

ok fine... so choon meng suggested a race.. agreed... so we went 1,2,3 GO!

we were sort of on par for like 60m? then he slowed down suddenly then i heard a *splash~*

but ignored it cause we were racing?

about 40m later i turned back.. woops~ he capped~ xP

then the usual continued later on...

but what is to remember is what happened at mac~

how on earth did they get the idea to gossip me and QI FANG!? can you imagine? the mental torture they put me into? x(

ok la... not to be bad... she is a nice girl but she is not my type of girl... and she has someone in mind?! so why try get me into trouble? xP

2007-07-02T05:13:00.000-07:00

me and shud =)

Tz wanted to do something stupid to Li bing at first xP took too soon

taken at top shop~

ahaha~ shud look so funny here~ xP

this was quite funny~ i was holding on to Fern's digicam and Li bing looked stupid so i look at her then shud snapped the photo~ xP

2007-07-02T04:57:00.000-07:00

nothing to talk about today la... xP

let's talk about sunday!! xDD

quite fun sia~ so long never had soooo much laughter~ xP

Tz came over eariler around 1230+ to try fix the ff9 thingy but failed~ so we left for cwp

then we met Fern and Clement first then Tz went off for ssw/swo meeting then the 3 of us like idiot walking around~ xP lucky Shud and Li bing came soon later like 5 mins? xP

then walk again like idiot cause dunno want to go where...

after like 1/2 hr? then we decided to go to mos to grab a bite and leave for town...

i got a spicy chillie dog and a small iced milk tea... damn nice i tell you the hotdog~ xP

went to town, went to heren first to get clement's cds... -.-

then Fern bluffed Shud and went back to hmv to get her the spirited away cd which she wanted sooo badly~ xDD

shopped again... say FISH! at four skins~ xP she was soo funny la... xP

then went around again... failed to get my jeans... =/

but nvm... we bought a packet of oyster thingy and sat by the road side eating~ xP

then Tz came soon later... went to fcuk then pepper lunch~

then clement need to leave so we sent him off before taking a bus to marina square then walked over to the esplanade~

they girls forcefully made us take photos at the roof terence... till like 1030 then we tried to get a maxi... we tried the esplanada main road ent first no maxi... but i managed to tak some fun ny photos~ xP

later the taxi stand and finally got a maxi who charged us for a flat fare of $35 to go back to woodlands...

that was sunday~ seens simple but it was fun... =))

2007-06-29T09:09:00.000-07:00

today... was just another day... lolx~ lessons on and on..

wanted to reformat laptop today but take too long and going alone? nah...

ended up going to bugis with them...

didn't want to eat steamboat cause dun feel like it so...

me and youngly went to the near-by thai resturant to eat and slack...

ordered a thai-style fried kway tiao which i recomended to youngly cause i feel that it was nice

and so we ate... and talked... and ate and talked... for about 1 1/2 hrs? around there...

paid the bill then went to 7-11 to get change to pay youngly...

went back to find them at the steamboat place and they just finished LOL~ timing good huh? xP

tian yang then introduced bing lang to me its is GOOD! i tell you! xP

taste like cigarette without nicotine it rocked sia~ xP

met jerome later went to bugis street walk around...

then later to mac cause jerome haven eat...

and finally~ bus to toa payo and mrt back to woodlands...

2007-06-28T07:09:00.000-07:00

damn... my windows sot already IE and window media player cannot use =/

have to resort to using firefox and itunes for surfing the web and itunes for music.. haix...

anyways... today training damn shag AGAIN... really too long never train i think...

ran 4km in 24mins shit sia...

then later gym as usual need to go down by 1 level or up to 2 levels for almost everything... =(

then later pull-ups as usual i only do 30 xP should be doing 40 only i just cheat across xP along with the 20 push ups i do 15 only xP but last one kena re-do cause nv do properly..

abs sucked bad la... abit too much very straining for my neck more of xP

end of today~~ hope tml wn be as crap as this...

2007-06-27T07:22:00.000-07:00

oday for cnoeing is DAMN fun lor!! xP

started out boring... same old stuff...

then when paddling damn shiok~

cuz Billy didn't want to paddle T1 o he forced me to take T1

so i was like "huh... ok lor..."

imagine not paddling and training for almost 2 weeks already ask me paddle T1 LOL~

got down... paddle 100m *SPLASH!* capsize reason? seat too cramp and abit not used to it yet...

and so i went on paddlling for 1 km and back 2km already~

then when we were asked to lunch off i paddled for like... 250m? then *SPLASH!* cap no.2

reason? tigh cramp xP so kenneth and han ting emptied my boat and helped me up and so i went on paddling...

4km aleady~ phew~ so tiring... and thirsty... leaving for my next lap i was told to turn back at 500 mark not enough time...

did so... then seniors did short sprints~ i suddenly had like adreline rush lor pus and push heads down looking at the nose of the canoe for 250m

then... suddenly ran outta gas... slowed down and slowly paddled back 250m...

then when getting to parking lot... *SPLASH!* cap no.3 reason? when turning body weight tilted too much to the right fun huh? xP

then after training some idiot lost a paddle god knows who took it so if by sat cannot find pay...

if realy cannot find i think i gonna quit already dun wanna pay for something i nv lose and further more

some idiot nv buckle 2 life jacks = 100 push ups sian... lucky do 80 only cuz after paddling no strength and too long nv train... and so it was a short dinner and home sweet home~

2007-06-26T07:06:00.000-07:00

Time has run out, for me. Everything's distant and I don't know what to believe. It's so hard, lost in the world confusion. And I need to leave, for a while. Life is so meaningless, there is nothing worth a smile. So goodbye, I'll miss you.
And I'm sorry, but this is my fate. Everything is worthless, no one who wants me to stay. And I'm sorry, but I've waited too long. So here's my goodbye, no one will cry over me. I'm not worth any tears.
It's been the years, of abuse. Neglected to treat the dissorder, That controls my youth, for so long. I'm in a fleshy tomb, burried up above the ground. It's no use, why should I hold on? It's been five years, don't need one more. So goodbye, life's abuse.
And I'm sorry, but this is my fate. Everything is worthless, no one who wants me to stay. And I'm sorry, but I've waited too long. So here's my goodbye, no one will cry over me. I'm not worth any tears.
(Every 18 minutes, somebody dies from a suicide. Every 43 seconds, somebody attempts one. If you, or anybody you know, is suicidle, Call 1-800-784-2433.)
And I'm sorry, but this my fate. Everything is worthless, no one who wants me to stay. And I'm sorry, but I've waited too long. So here's my goodbye, no one will cry over me. So here's my goodbye, no one will cry over me. I'm not worth any tears.

2007-06-26T06:39:00.000-07:00

anyway let's talk about xiu hui lameo idiot stupid joke how bout it? xP

so everyoe knows about today having a UT right?

so after it i asked her "how? fail? xP"

and she was like "no! wth la! got 2 qns nv finish!"

and faci asked "anyone need tumbdrive?"

and she went "ME! ME!"

then she was like "eh! why my UT dun have my face one?!"

and i went like "LOLOLOLOLX!!!"

she returned a "what la..."

and so i said "you got no face see ppl! LOL!"

so she went like "LOL!!!!"

went on for awhile till she asked the faci

"faci ask the head put back my head lehz!"

so i went on "LOL!! there! your head there what? LOLOLX!!"

and so it became my joke of the day~ xP like usual and always xP

oh ya another thing today...

fish... that idiot...

msn me when she was just beside me...

guess what it was for?

"i testing font only! HAHA!"

i went "-.-"

and so i tried to push her head into her laptop screen xP

2007-06-26T01:19:00.000-07:00

bored in class sia...~

lucky today no need to do research... xP

anyways today damn lame la xP

so cold... the still lend sabrina my jacket =(( but nvm... sisterhood ma...

memories of wha happened in the lift LOL! damn funny sia~

i was turned into a vampire liao la... =/ who ask her dun become back normal...

but anything for you...

2007-06-25T03:31:00.000-07:00

PHEW!! another day in school... damn slack today nv do ppt do skit only and talk on ppt...

i swear my grade for today sure kena C xP

so many people not in school also today..

aisyah, iskanda, jessica, kai ling...

both breaks sucked la~

$3 to live for 4 days is it even possible? =

wed going back to training already so sian...

i was told quota increased to 45 already =/ sucks...

who caes la just do la.. nothing else to do also wad~ xP

2007-06-24T05:48:00.000-07:00

phew! so beat yesterday slep at 4:15am woke up at 1 odd

but i swear i was drunk yesterday night~ xP

finished half the bottle in like 2 days?

i will post the pic someday with the indications~

its not much but it kinda nice until you wake up feeling like puking~ xP

anyways i am finished with it and kept the bottle already~

2007-06-23T12:08:00.000-07:00

though we may be apart,

remember that i am always just a phone call away,

if you need anything,

i will come for you no matter what,

because i still love you,

dun feel sad,

dun blame yourself,

it was not your fault it ended this way,

i just can't bear to see your suffer,

and so i thought this is what is best.

2007-06-23T10:23:00.000-07:00

dun care no more and dun want no more,

if that's the way it is to be,

so let it be,

never wished for it to be as it is now,

never wanted it to feel as it is now,

but if helps us both then i gladly accept the fact,

the last time i saw bird fly my heart bled,

my loved one was taken from this earth,

but now,

birds flew but my heart bleed not,

so now i know for sure it is meant to be,

thanks for what you have given back to me,

for now i know that i will not bleed again for something i dun need.

i am not emo no more thanks to my besties, anna for the comfort thanks alot YOU THIS BANANA! WHO STILL OW ME A DAY OUT! =x
and sheila for listening
and jerome for slacking and listening to my boring long winded stories and not beating the crap outta me xP
iskanda for being so concerned even though i sounded like smacking you accross the face yesterday xP
thanks~
i will remember you guys! you can count on me for that! xP

may the fellowship of the 3 musketeers(namely, emo,idiot,and childish =x)
and the sisterhood stay for as long as i can remember! thanks! =D

free air taste sweetest when you dun choke on it

2007-06-23T08:20:00.001-07:00

"Famous Last Words"
Now I know That I can't make you stayBut where's your heart?But where's your heart?But where's your...
And I knowThere's nothing I can sayTo change that partTo change that partTo change...
So manyBright lights, they cast a shadowBut can I speak?Well is it hard understandingI'm incompleteA life that's so demandingI get so weakA love that's so demandingI can't speak
I am not afraid to keep on livingI am not afraid to walk this world alone Honey if you stay, I'll be forgivenNothing you can say can stop me going home
Can you seeMy eyes are shining bright'Cause I'm out hereOn the other sideOf a jet black hotel mirrorAnd I'm so weakIs it hard understandingI'm incompleteA love that's so demandingI get weak
I am not afraid to keep on livingI am not afraid to walk this world alone Honey if you stay, I'll be forgivenNothing you can say can stop me going home
I am not afraid to keep on livingI am not afraid to walk this world alone Honey if you stay, I'll be forgivenNothing you can say can stop me going home
These bright lights have always blinded meThese bright lights have always blinded meI say
I see you lying next to meWith words I thought I'd never speakAwake and unafraidAsleep or dead
(How can I see, I see you lying) 'Cause I see you lying next to me(How can I see, I see you lying) With words I thought I'd never speak(How can I see, I see you lying) Awake and unafraid(How can I see, I see you lying) Asleep or dead
'Cause I see you lying next to meWith words I thought I'd never speakAwake and unafraidAsleep or dead
'Cause I see you lying next to meWith words I thought I'd never speakAwake and unafraidAsleep or dead
I am not afraid to keep on livingI am not afraid to walk this world alone (Or dead)Honey if you stay, I'll be forgivenNothing you can say can stop me going home(Or dead)I am not afraid to keep on livingI am not afraid to walk this world alone (Or dead)Honey if you stay, I'll be forgivenNothing you can say can stop me going home(Or dead)I am not afraid to keep on livingI am not afraid to walk this world alone (Or dead)Honey if you stay, I'll be forgivenNothing you can say can stop me going home

http://www.plyrics.com/m/mychemicalromance.html

2007-06-23T08:19:00.000-07:00

"I Don't Love You"
Well, when you goDon't ever think I'll make you try to stayAnd maybe when you get back I'll be off to find another way
And after all this time that you still owe You're still the good-for-nothing I don't knowSo take your gloves and get outBetter get out While you can
When you goWould you even turn to say"I don't love youLike I didYesterday"
Sometimes I cry so hard from pleadingSo sick and tired of all the needless beatingBut baby when they knock youDown and outIt's where you oughta stay
And after all the blood that you still oweAnother dollar's just another blowSo fix your eyes and get up Better get upWhile you canWhoa, whooa
When you goWould you even turn to say"I don't love youLike I didYesterday"
Well come on, come on
When you goWould you have the guts to say"I don't love you Like I loved youYesterday"

http://www.plyrics.com/m/mychemicalromance.html
I don't love you Like I loved youYesterday
I don't love youLike I loved you Yesterday

2007-06-23T08:14:00.000-07:00

"It's Not A Fashion Statement, It's A Deathwish"
For what you did to me,and what I'll do to you,you get, what everyone else gets,you get a lifetime
Let's go!
Do you remember that day when we met you told me this gets harder well it didbeen holding on forever,promise me that when I'm gone you'll kill my enemies,the damage you've inflicted temporary woundsI'm coming back from the dead and I'll take you home with meI'm taking back the life you stole
We never got that far,this helps me to think all through the nightbright lights that, won't kill me now, or tell me how just you and I, your starless eyes remain.
Hip Hip Hooray for me, you talk to me, but would you kill me in my sleep lay still like the deadfrom the razor to the rosarywe could lose ourselvesand paint these walls in pitchfork red
I will avenge my ghost with every breath I takeI'm coming back from the dead and I'll take you home with meI'm taking back the life you stole
This hole that you put me in wasn't deep enough and I'm climbing out right now you're running out of places to hide from me when you gojust know that I will remember youif living was the hardest partwe'll then one day be togetherand in the end we'll fall apartjust like the leaves change in colorsand then I will be with you I will be there one last time now
when you gojust know that I will remember you
I lost my fear of fallingI will be with youI will be with you

http://www.plyrics.com/m/mychemicalromance.html

muhahaha!

2007-06-23T01:58:00.000-07:00

guess what? jerome was psed!! LOL! xPP

and as usual... when he gets psed he calls me to go to bishan to eat wanton mee with him AGAIN!

2nd time this month and just the both of us AGAIN! LOL~ xP

talked cock alot alot of cock... (but how many cocks were there? 2? xP)

anyway just talked crap gossiped abit talk about past experiences encounters

fun times...

missed my pri6 days and sec 3 ~ sec 5 days

life is fun then... no worries, cock everyday, lame everyday, laugh everyday

the good times they call it...

really missed those days...

but if you gave me a time machine... i would just go back one year

and tell my the person dearest to me that she is sooooo important to me before she passed away...